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| Magnus & Sophie |
Having a puppy is awesome. You just can't do anything. You can't leave the room or he barks and whines. You can't leave the house because he waters the floor like its on fire or something. You can't leave him outside because he will drop a two-sie in one neighbor's yard, then run to the other neighbor's garden and eat their bushes. Note the data from a recent survey Magnus filled out:
You can't leave socks on the floor. He hunts down dirty underwear like a Level 3 Sex Offender. He chewed the cover off our only copy of "Idiots Guide to Puppies", without the slightest pause to ponder the irony. He will, without fail, sleep all afternoon and then erupt into a roiling cauldron of kinetic energy two minutes before you're going to bed.
Did I mention the growth rate? It makes a bamboo forest look like a house plant with a thyroid condition by comparison. 19 lbs when we got him. 31 lbs after the first week. 43 lbs ten days after that. This cannot be sustainable. I don't know about his carbon footprint, but his actual footprint could be filled with water and converted into a wildlife preserve. Deer would look about cautiously before bending to take a cool drink from Lake Frontleftpaw. Here's Mags, to weeks apart.
In that first shot, he could fit snuggly inside Paris Hilton's purse. Two weeks later I can barely cram him into a duffel bag. By early May, he'll be swatting at planes from atop the Empire State Building. Good thing he eats rocks. Rocks are largely free.
I Heart You.
